Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Ornery Monster

A little bug has crawled up inside my sweet little child and turned him into an ornery monster. No joke. If I have a button, little r is finding it and pushing it as many times as possible - all at once! With the good tends to come a wave of orneriness, that tests the core of my being as a mother. What is it that makes toddlers so unpredictable?

For a two-year old, I can't complain much. He really is a great kid. The past couple weeks he's been sleeping much better at night, and he seems to have figured out that waking up before the sun might not be all it's cracked up to be. I've even started getting up early on my own accord (yes, I'm that crazy, don't ask), just to get an hour or more of mommy-time before my house is awake for the day.

AND - big announcement - the kid finally took a bath all by himself last night. It has been a long time coming, and we are hoping it's not a fluke. Apparently the bugs were at bay, so he could enjoy the tub without fear. He was so excited to be in the bath with his toys again.

All that aside, my little man is also incredibly headstrong and he is determined lately to test every boundary. I remember going through this with him when he was around a year old, but somehow it seems much more evil this time. Apparently Mommy is funny when she's mad. Have you ever had someone laugh at you for your anger? Not a good thing. Let's just say I've had to do some deep breathing and counting backwards from 10 with my eyes closed.

Naptime is slowly becoming a thing of the past, and this is not going to work for little r or for me. Unfortunately, I think the problem is related to his after school adventures with his friend, Linus, getting him all riled up and off schedule. The difficult task will be trying to figure out how to fix it in a friendly way. Life is a bit too exciting for the little man these days, and I can hardly blame him. But alas, the boy needs sleep! I've read and gotten all sorts of advice on how to keep little r down for a nap - everything from locking the door or using a child gate, to less intense measures of silently putting him down again (no anger or soothing, zero emotion). I'm not sure if he's quite old enough to understand precise rules, but we are getting close. The last thing I want to do is enforce bad behavior, so I feel like I'm treading a fine line here.

Yesterday I flat out gave up and just let the kid stay awake. We took the puppy for a walk and enjoyed the afternoon sunshine. Little r threw at least five tantrums before finally relaxing and having fun with the puppy. My approach is generally to stay calm and not let the crazy monster win. The advice I've been getting, though, is that I need to be a bit more confident in my authority. Something I'm working on.

Today is another day, and hopefully I'll hit the sack tonight with my sanity in check.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

 

12 comments:

  1. Great post - as a dad of two (with our third on the way) my wife and I can relate. Glad I found you on the ultimate blog challenge!

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    1. I feel like I am full of stories, and yet I only have one! I'm glad you are here as well :)

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  2. Oh, boy...

    I have a 2 year old as well who is my "tester" (his older brother didn't do it the way this one does!). He also has given up naps for the most part and I just let him stay awake now and don't even try. Sometimes he'll fall asleep on his own in random places--the couch, the chair, the kitchen floor...

    He is definitely more challenging than his brother, and I have less patience and stamina with him because he is #2. At least if the older one had been challenging, it was a one-on-one situation.

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    1. We had a much better day today, but little r definitely keeps me on my toes and makes life interesting (and challenging!).

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  3. Ah, memories. Distant- but still deeply implanted...
    The best advice is the standard advice. This, too, shall pass. As little r learns his boundaries, shows his mettle, and extends his awareness, it tries your patience and sanity. The trick is to insure neither of you become patients and maintain sanguinity.

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    1. Little r has been aware of his world since day 1 and has to explore every facet of it. His personality definitely keeps me guessing and moving! I think my sentence, "What is it that makes toddlers so unpredictable" will be said at every phase of this kid's life!

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  4. As the Momma of a 3 year old and a 4 year old I too can relate. My 4 year old is the one that pushes every button possible. I love my monsters (I've called them that since the day the morning err... all-day-sickness began), but sometimes I'm just sitting here praying bedtime will come faster. I try to remind myself that 'this too shall pass' like previous commenter noted but it's hard some days. I still wouldn't trade it for anything. :) Glad to have found you, ya for the UBC. :)

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    1. I wouldn't trade it for anything either. As tasking as it can be. That's one of the reasons I'm glad I started blogging. I tend to feel better sharing with others. Knowing you are not alone in all of the craziness seems to help sometimes.

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  5. As a mom of an almost 17 year old son and an almost 17 year old bonus son, I can still remember those days. The hard part is knowing that some of that orneriness will serve him well as an adult and yet not squashing all of it because it's easier on us as parents!

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    1. I worry about those things as well. Even though it can be exhausting, it is also rewarding when you successfully fix a minor problem or figure out how to decrease the number of tantrums. I'm sure he's helping my character building as well!

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  6. HI! :) I have a 3 year old little boy and know all-too-well the things you're talking about. Especially with the laughing at your anger and the avoiding nap. One thought that maybe you've not heard, is to offer silence time. A time where he goes to bed and is in his bed with his books or his animals, but is SILENT. We call it "Making Silence" and sometimes, when he's in there, he falls asleep, so we get a nap out of him. But either way, he's having to be calm and still...which is a rest in itself. Wishing you all the best in your transitions!

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    1. That is a great idea and one that I'm going to try right away! Thanks so much for your suggestion!

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