Showing posts with label Toddler. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Toddler. Show all posts

Monday, February 25, 2013

That whole potty training thing...

You have heard me mention in varying expletives over the past year how potty training my little man is just doomed to never happen. Believe me, until about a month ago, I truly felt that I would have the only kid in grade school wearing diapers. We are often our worst critics as parents, and I had myself convinced I was doomed for defeat in this category because every attempt I made was an epic failure.

Well, I'm happy to report the "oh-so-should-be-private" accomplishment that little r is finally potty trained. And no, I'm not lying, I swear completely that it has happened, and no one is more shocked about it than I am. I wasn't going to write a blog about it with the internet being forever and all, but a couple of things are motivating me to write down at least some generalities of what finally went right for us. One of those motivations was the fact that as parents, and mothers especially, we are hungry for others to tell us their experiences about what worked for them. I know I'm definitely one of those mothers that can't get enough help from others, especially online. I'm sharing my experience just in case it happens to help someone with this challenge. And an even bigger motivator is that I want to remember what worked for little r for the next little man in my life. Yes, regretfully, and dreadfully, he will need to transition from the diaper world and enter our toilet trained society. I am doomed to forget some likely major points, so I wanted to get them written down. (Hopefully little r will forgive me for this later - sorry, dude!)

So, here we go...

1. You know your child best. I am likely the last person in the world to be giving advice on the topic of potty training. But there is one thing I would like to say to all of the other mothers out there, you know your kid best - trust your instinct and try hard not to let judgments get to you. We are so incredibly overwhelmed with information these days about what to do, or more importantly, what not to do, that we lose sight of the fact that people have been doing these parenting tasks for a very, VERY long time without the endless advice of those on the internet and in a dozen books we are talked into buying. By the time your child is ready to be potty trained (which a friend once told me will happen when they are ready at 3 years old, or if you push them, at 36 months - haha), you will hopefully see clearly that every child is remarkably different.

Also, you will hear stories and read blogs and other sources, both online and in books, about training your child to use a toilet in one day. One single solitary day - HA! Really people, can any child be trained to do ANYTHING in one day? This is hogwash. I don't care how many people make money off of this or can provide you proof otherwise. Not only will it not happen, it will likely set your child up for many accidents and setbacks.

Instead, look for the signs that he is ready. Try to put yourself in his mind, if that's even possible, and see if he is truly getting it. Trust yourself on this, and don't let anyone convince you otherwise. At the end of the day, this is your kid. You know best.


2. Make sure you are ready. This might seem like a really ridiculous thing to say, but for me it was so very important. We had so many attempts at potty training that ended badly. I gave into the ever-convenient world of diapers at the slightest push-back from my little man. He is incredibly stubborn and independent. Well, guess what? That quality does not come to him from just anywhere, I happen to be exactly the same (and don't get me started on Big R). We were doomed from the start thinking we had complete control of this child. Believe me, we do not. What I strongly feel made things work this time was that I was ready. I knew he could do it, but more than that, I was finally in a place where I could hold onto some resolve. I needed to be as stubborn as he was. This was far more important in the success of the training than I ever wanted to admit. As a mother, you are supposed to always be ready, right? Blaming little r for every time we failed really probably wasn't fair. I understand that now.

3. Go cold turkey. This might not work for every kid, or every parent, for that matter, but it is starting to become the best approach to successful outcomes with little r (and to be fair, for me as well). When I weaned little r off of his bottle, it was hardly a weaning process. I just stopped. Cold turkey. At age 1, we went to only sippy cups, and I put all the bottles away. Was this painful and agonizing? Holy gazongas, YES! For two weeks I called my mom at least 2-3 times a day nearly in tears wanting to give in. It was hard, but I stuck to my guns, and it worked. It might not have been fun, but really, the first few days were the hardest. Well, guess what?! That was the exact same approach I took here. The first few days were the hardest, yet again, but then, it just stuck. Things finally clicked for little r, and we were rockin' the potty time on the big boy toilet and the accidents left the building (mostly - haha).

So, the diapers ended. The first morning was brutal. Big R was here to help, and we agonized over the screaming child together. It was amazing how much he resisted even being out of a diaper. But I refused to give in, and I think having Big R here to help me with that was huge in our success. I also stuck to my guns and decided that the diaper would not be used under any circumstances except for sleeping at night (to avoid the poor kid waking up soaking wet - turns out he has woken up only once with a wet diaper since we started). No matter what. Whether we left the house for swimming, gymnastics, or school, I would just deal with the consequences and that was that. This is why I think point #2 above is so important. You really need to be mentally prepared for this in every way...

4. Make sure you have the time. It's no secret that we travel a lot. When you are doing something like potty training, you really need to give yourself a block of time to make things work. Right, easier said than done. Not only do we travel too much, but I hate sitting still. I am incessantly on the go, and little r and I like things this way. It was finally at the point where I needed to relinquish my freedom for a few days. We had a decent four day block of time with a German holiday creating a long weekend (I hated the idea of him missing school for this, so this holiday was perfect), and I wanted to give us a good solid chunk of time before chancing leaving the house. It ended up being just enough time. Not even a week after leaving the diapers behind, we went on our ski trip to Austria, and little r literally only wore his diaper for sleeping at night. He skied and played in the snow all day with underwear on and didn't have a single accident. I was so proud.

5. Bribery isn't always necessary or required to make it work. I had tried every big bribe in the book. Nothing worked. My kid was too independent to be told that he'd get some sort of treat. I won't lie, bribery can help get certain things moving forward. We had a sticker system for awhile that encouraged him to at least sit on the potty once in awhile, and I would bribe him by saying he couldn't have his snack or watch his favorite show until he used the potty first. It worked, but not the way I had heard other people have such amazing success. Like I said, you know your kid best.

For little r, it turned out that the best bribery was encouragement and praise - LOTS of praise! He loves to feel proud and for you to be proud of him. For each challenge along the way, high fives and saying "you are SO awesome" went a really long way to make him want to keep it up.

6. Don't give up. I had to keep saying this mantra to myself over and over again. Stand your ground and don't let yourself give up. You owe it to your kid to be strong so that they can be strong, too. At 3 they can be the world's most incredibly manipulators. My child is a master at it, and he threw everything he had at me. Each day I realized how far we had come, and I knew that giving in would only be another set back that through us to the beginning where we'd have to start all over. All they need is a small sign that you will give in and they will run with it. Well, at least that's how little r can be. This was especially hard to get him past not wanting to do more than pee in the toilet. Messes are no fun for either of us, but he was never going to learn if I didn't stand my ground and push through the sloppy, nasty, mess (or the incessant constipation that ensued from refusing to go).

7. Don't beat yourself up for not being ready before. I kept torturing myself with thoughts that maybe I was so wrong and he was really ready before, but I was simply too wimpy. You both need to be ready or it doesn't work. Sometimes trusting your instincts means also understanding yourself and what you are capable of at that point in time. You are seeing signs that he isn't ready, and you are worried it will only result in major setbacks and many unpleasant accidents. I should have avoided "pull-ups" because they really are just diapers that cost more anyway, right? Or I should have taken advantage of the warmer weather and gotten this done in the summer time, or not given in when we were seeing success a whole year ago.

Stop these thoughts. You cannot change the past, and it's ok if you might have been able to train him sooner had you been stronger. The truth is, you were probably right, and your kid was not ready. This is moreso the case with those of us that have boys. All those studies out there show that boys often need more time. This is so much the case that it's almost a fact in my mind. Give yourself a break.

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For what's it's worth, these are my pointers. I hope they are helpful to some of my friends that are struggling with the whole potty training thing. I also have many friends that had a much different experience with their kids where it was likely easier or they used a wildly different approach. And that is a-ok. Whatever works, just works. If my approach helps you succeed, then I am endlessly ecstatic that I was able to provide some insight and encouragement.

The bottomline is that it's probably one of the most grueling parts of parenting, even moreso than sleep training or bottle weaning. I swear, it is not fun in any way. Except for the high fives, the huge proud smiles, and the knowledge that you are finally one step closer to preparing your child to survive in a socially acceptable manner in this world of ours. Be prepared with rubber gloves and bleach, multiple pairs of underwear, copious amounts of laundry, and many, MANY accidents. Remember that at this age you are already intimately familiar with the unpleasant side of your child's natural tendencies - handling a little urine and disgusting poop is second nature at this point. It won't last forever, so just roll with it...

So, here's to little r for making mommy proud. It's not that I never thought we could do it, but I was incredibly impressed with how quickly he caught on. Every time I hear his cute little voice say, "I have to go potty" I smile knowing we just conquered a huge hurdle. YAY for us, and high fives all around. And to those of you entering this fun and exciting phase of parenting - good luck, have fun, and try not to lose your sanity.

 




 

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Istanbul:Turkey for Thanksgiving

Istanbul is exotic, positively energetic, friendly in every possible way, and full of excitement.  Our family trip to Istanbul was absolutely fantastic.  We planned this trip after talking to several of our friends that had recently done the excursion to this city that spans two continents.  Everyone was overflowing with incredible things to say about Istanbul.  I think though, despite having talked with so many people about it, we really had no idea what to expect from this trip, but we were extremely excited nonetheless.

I have to say, this was probably one of our easier family trips.  Big R was able to find cheap airfare on Turkish Airlines direct into Istanbul from Nuremberg.  Except for the handful of trips we've traveled to by car, all of our air and train travel has required us to drive to Munich or Frankfurt.  It seems the departure times have always been at an ungodly hour requiring an overnight stay or a ridiculously early waking hour.  Not this time.  Nuremberg is a simple and easy 45 minute drive from our house.  It was pure heaven for a family well-accustomed to the unneeded stresses that often comes with the "travel" part of our trips.  (Parking at the airport is a tad more expensive than we had anticipated, but overall it was worth it.)

So, after an easy commute to the airport and a positively exceptional flight on Turkish Airlines (we were served a gourmet meal for a 2.5 hour flight!), we landed in Istanbul.  We did relatively little planning for this trip in comparison to others.  Big R secured the flight and he found us a perfect hotel right in the center of everything with an off-season rate that can't be beat (only 40 EUR/night!).  Because we saved so much on the hotel, we decided to splurge for the car service offered by our hotel and not fight with the metro from Istanbul.  We had heard stories that it was an adventure to be had - we just were not in the mood for it to be had by us.  Aside from a minor glitch in us somehow missing the sign with our name on it, everything worked out fairly perfect.

We stayed in Sultanahmet, which is the Old City of Istanbul.  One of the things we absolutely loved about Istanbul was that despite it's enormity, many of the "sights" that draw visitors were all located within a short walking distance of each other.  I have no doubt there is so much more to see and experience in Istanbul than what we fit into our short stay there, but we never felt shorted.  Our hotel was a five minute walk from the Sultanahmet (Blue) Mosque, Hagia Sophia, Topkapi Palace, the Bascilla Cistern, and the Grand Bazaar.  We didn't take long to settle in, and immediately went for a walk after sundown to take in the city.  As soon as we heard the muezzins voicing the call to prayer, we knew we were in a different place than we had ever been before. 

Minaret - a distinctive feature of a mosque - sends the call to prayer from the top of its tower

Here are some photographs to give you a flavor of the sites to see around the Old City in Istanbul:

My favorite picture of the Blue Mosque - just breathtaking!
Inside the Blue Mosque
Intricate details of the ceiling inside the Blue Mosque
All of the mosques had hanging lanterns as lighting - beautiful!
Little r and me inside the Blue Mosque
One of the entrances into Hagia Sophia  - built in 537 A.D.
Ornate details inside this 2,000 year old structure
Taking in the incredible details of Hagia Sophia
Ceiling of Hagia Sophia
View of Hagia Sophia
Entrance to Topaki Palance - we were welcomed by a rainbow
We were excited to visit this Palace used until very recently by the Sultans
They spared no detail on the walls, ceilings, floors...




View of the Bosphorous River and the Asia side of Istanbul from the Palace

Inside the Grand Bazaar - we were early and beat the crowds
A vendor selling lanterns that are common throughout Istanbul
Inside the Bascilla Cistern
The underground structure was ancient and wondrous...
The Cistern had a romantic yet spooky feel
The sites are most definitely something to see in Istanbul, but what we loved most about this city was experiencing the entirety of it.  It was easily one of the most friendly places we have ever visited. The Turkish people are so friendly it's almost overwhelming. Children can do no wrong, and little r was constantly the center of attention.  It did not matter where we were or what we were doing, little r was noticed and daunted over.  He loved it, and it put Big R and I at ease because we were not constantly concerned about whether he was behaving.  This child could do no wrong in the eyes of Turks.  You think I'm kidding.  We had no fewer than two complete sets of strangers ask to have our pictures taken with them, and he was practically adopted at every restaurant. At Hagia Sophia, a swarm of young girls just about attacked Big R while he was carrying little r just so they could see his sweet little face.  I had to get a picture.  The best part is, you can't see little r in the picture, so it looks like Big R has a young Harem!

Big R and his Harem - little r is in there somewhere - promise
We also LOVED the food in Istanbul.  Our usual approach of seeking out a place to eat based on atmosphere, feel, and affordability never led us astray.  We had the most incredible meals on this trip.  I'm still dreaming about them.  It was the end of November, and the weather was not exactly warm, however, we sat outside for most of our dinners because the patio seating was heated and cozy.  We never did take the time to chill with a hooka and a cocktail (for probably obvious reasons - haha), but that's something that looked like an experience I'd recommend to others that do not have a toddler in tow and are not expecting :) 

Freshly squeezed pomegranate and other juices were available at stands all throughout the Old City
Lighting at one of the restaurants
Common street scene full of cafes and restaurants 
Lunch!

My absolute favorite meal and eating experience we had in Istanbul was an impromptu stop at a very local, amazingly authentic cafe near the Spice Market along the river.  It looked amazing, so I grabbed Big R by the arm and pulled him inside.  It was crowded with metal plates as tables and small stools as chairs.  Everyone was cozy and enjoying their food.  It was clearly a locals favorite.

The food was cooked right before you on a large grill - this picture does not capture the small size of this cafe
It was absolutely delicious!
Heading into the Spice Market on a busy Saturday afternoon!
It was an overwhelming sensation for the senses!
Our Thanksgiving holiday in Istanbul was primarily unplanned and we had no idea what to expect.  We were happily surprised by how much we fell in love with the people, the culture, and the experience.  We visited the sights, ate as much of the delicious food as we could find, made friends with dozens of people including other Americans, Turkish families and restauranteers, and even folks from Montenegro.  We adopted at least half a dozen stray cats, and got cozy on the metro during a rainstorm that left everyone soaked.  I can't recommend this city enough, especially if you have children.  The weather was wet and cold (because that's how it always works out for us), but I think that visiting this city in an off-season is the best way to take it all in without the smoldering heat and crowds. 

Here are a few more photographs of our fantastic experience in Istanbul...

We bought little r a flute, and he played it the entire weekend
Outside the Blue Mosque (baby bump alert!)
A perfect place for a cat nap
Shopping was an experience unto itself in Istanbul
We made many furry friends on this visit - strays in Istanbul are as friendly as the people!
Delicious Turkish pastries near the Spice Market
We took a boat cruise down the Bosphorous - little r made many friends!
View from our hotel roof terrace during breakfast each morning
Our last morning in Istanbul - the sun finally came out
Family portrait in front of the Blue Mosque




 

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Searching for answers

Everyone warns you about the terrible twos. Your children become monsters and life seems impossible. That's what they say. What those same people forget to tell you though is that three is a whole new ball game. My SAHM status has entered an entirely new level of challenge these past few months, and I'm finding myself extremely lost and searching for answers.

Sometimes having a Type A personality can really frustrate your life. Going with the flow feels difficult because you want to overanalyze everything. At least that's how it seems to always work with me. My sole purpose in life, my one job, is to be a mother and take care of my family. That's my job, and I have felt lately as though I'm failing miserably at this task.

Big R and I noticed that things have felt off-kilter. No one was sleeping well, and you could sense that we were all a tad bit upside down. After some thought, we realized that for about six months straight we traveled somewhere literally every two weeks. Don't get me wrong, the travels have been incredible and we have been able to see so much. But traveling can really wear you down. The routine is in a constant mode of disruption. Sleep cycles are interrupted, eating habits are askew, and expectations that you normally receive from a consistent schedule are nonexistent. No matter who you are, this can create internal unrest. We could feel it in little r for sure, and the more we thought about what was driving our sleep and moods lately, we realized that we were just as effected as our toddler - we just have a different way of expressing our stress (obviously).

Now that we have had some time to rest, we've nestled into our routines, and when that two week window passed, we all started to feel better that our schedule was staying consistent (well, hospital stays aside that is). Despite this establishment of a good routine, I was still feeling huge changes in little r's personality. I've been exhausted. On good days, I'm smiling all day long, but bad days were leaving me drained.

I have to confess that I never saw myself being a SAHM. Never did I judge anyone that chose to stay home, believe me, I know that it is a challenge. It was just something I didn't ever anticipate. As much as I adore children, especially my little r, I seem to be missing that mom-gene that desires constant play. My child is active and naptime is now nonexistent, which means from lunchtime until bedtime it's just me and little r tackling the world. Sometimes these days feel like one constant struggle making me feel as if I'm a drill sergeant constantly screaming orders. Yes, I have been feeling so lost - I hate who I am when I'm like this. No one is happy. But what have I been doing wrong? Why does being a good mother have to be so hard?

One day I decided to step back and watch little r more closely. I've known for awhile that he's a little different than other kids, but not in a medical way necessarily. I just know that his temperament is different. He's hard-headed, incredibly perceptive, super sensitive to things, and his activity level is off the charts and has been since he was an infant. Big R and I envy our friends that can place their babies on a blanket with a few toys and walk away. Even before little r started crawling at six months, we never witnessed him be still for any moment of time. There is too much to see in the world and we were not going to stop him.

After talking casually with a few friends, it dawned on me that little r might be what has been referred to as a "spirited" child. Spirited children have personality traits that make incredible adults, but they can be an exhaustive challenge as a toddler. Accepting this, I started to see things differently. It's as if I just needed an answer so that I could better understand how to be a good mother to little r. I didn't want to be a drill sergeant anymore, and I was done feeling like my life was spiraling out of control.

My friend lent a book to me called "Raising your spirited child" and I ordered a couple other books to read as well. I wanted to better understand how my child's mind works. I needed to be able to perceive his triggers and be more sensitive to how he reacts to the world. In reading about spirited children, I've also learned so many things about myself. I've realized that my temperament and personality traits don't necessarily mesh well with several of his. Not only that, but the spirited child has extreme parts of his personality that I might not understand because I don't feel the same way.

LIttle r is far more perceptive than I am. I wish often that I could see the world the way he does. He notices everything. He's very much like his father in that way. I do have an extreme energy level though. Although my mom tries to convince me I was a dream as a child, I have a feeling I was far more active than others, and I know I was certainly more active than my sister. My ability to sit still to read a book or listen to a long lecture without fidgeting is lacking, and when I do take quiet time for myself, the guilt sets in quickly. I suppose I always feel like I'm missing something or maybe just missing out, either way, I can much better relate to that side of little r's personality.

I'm hoping that educating myself a bit more about how little r's mind works and how he perceives his world will leave us less angry with each other and keep our lives in a more constant calm. I've been surprised to find out that my motherly instinct has not lead me astray in all aspects of working with little r, and I have actually handled my approach to his maniacal temperament in ways authors of these books recommend. But I have also been able to identify where I have gone wrong. It's going to be difficult to tackle these challenges because it'll be fighting my own temperament and personality traits in a way to restore order in my house. Hopefully though, we will be able to find some balance that'll make the challenges a little less exhausting.

 

 

Saturday, September 8, 2012

Hot headed red totty

Holy mackerel - little r had a colossal meltdown of epic proportions today. It was truly a sight to behold. I wish you all could have been there to witness it.

We are, quite frankly, pushing little r's limits these days. Traveling somewhere every couple of weeks with hardly a routine to be found is even wearing us adults out. But he has been doing exceptionally well being adaptable and even cooperative for the most part.

The occasional meltdown occurs, but it has been awhile since we experienced one that turns heads. And boy, did my hot headed toddler turn heads today...

We met up with some friends at the market this morning for breakfast and to pick up produce and some other fun items - our favorite "usual" Saturday morning routine. Little r was extremely well behaved during breakfast and got only a little antsy walking around the market. Nothing too out of the norm.

We decided to go to the Müller (think Target) to explore the fun toys. Our little man has a birthday coming up soon, so we were looking for good ideas. Little r is typically not that kid that falls apart in toy stores. He does really well understanding he can't have all the toys, but is cute about identifying all the things he wishes we would buy him. In fact, it's one of our favorite things to do with him because he's so darned cute.

The hot wheels were crazy cheap, so we told him he could pick out two. Guess that was my first mistake. His understanding of numbers is fairly elementary. After at least 30 minutes of incredible and darn right cute behavior in the store and the monster was unleashed.

Here it came bellowing from the depths within his tiny tummy. There was no turning back...the meltdown began. He was super tired, probably hungry, and outright pissed at us for telling him only two cars were coming home. Wow, such unappreciative behavior - ha! I'm no idiot (or maybe I am?) and knew this was not behavior to be rewarded. The hot wheels were put back on the shelves and out we went...

My little hot headed monster kicked, screamed, yelled, thrashed, and cried his heart out as we worked our way out of the store. Then he continued into the market thrashing around. It was un-freaking-believable. The last time he did this was when we were in Venice, and I lost it and utterly broke down.

I was randomly calm today. This calm was mostly likely brought about because Big R somehow stayed completely put together. It's sad to say, but we were almost laughing at the scene. Shaking our heads and passing looks at each other. This must be a survival tool we develop as parents to avoid going insane.

I hardly noticed all the eyes on us until this elder woman decided she needed to talk to us in German and broken English. I suppose we did appear as though we were in great need of assistance. The lady was actually quite nice and sympathetic and she was clearly feeling our pain. But then I looked around and noticed everyone staring. Somehow I had taught myself not to see or feel this to avoid sheer embarrassment, but there was no avoiding it today.

I looked around and felt like eyes were boring into our heads. Jaws were dropping, hands were covering people's mouths, and woman were gasping. I mean really, people, is a toddler meltdown really that extreme to you? There is no way German children never go through this. I found myself just hoping people could see we weren't hurting him. The last thing we wanted was for anyone to think calling the polizei was necessary.

We remained randomly calm when we should have been in tears, and we fought our screaming toddler until we made it to our bikes where it took another 15 minutes to chill him out enough for the bike ride home. It was fantastic! What a crazy mess.

I seriously hope to avoid such a meltdown again, but I know this was one of many more to come. It's nice to recognize that we have at least learned to take them in stride.

What do you do to survive the ultimate toddler tantrum in a public place?

 


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone


 

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Packing Light with a Toddler in Tow

Tonight we are setting off for yet another exciting adventure. This particular adventure is a tad bit different than trips we've taken in the past. We're heading to Mallorca where we'll be spending exorbitant amounts of time worshiping the sun, feeling the sand between our toes, and swimming in the Mediterranean Sea. Exploration of the local towns will be done, if for nothing else to discover the delicious local cuisine; however, unlike our other adventures, this one is a true vacation - or at least that's the plan. Nothing but pure relaxation. The three of us will be joined by two of our closest friends here in Germany, and we cannot wait!

Another difference between this trip and others is that we are flying the infamous Ryanair. You can find ridiculously low fares, which is the reason we are flying to Mallorca this weekend, but they have strict rules, so you have to be wary of carry-on restrictions, boarding pass requirements, and joining the cattle call to find a seat on board. Because of this, we have to take our already light travel habits one step further to be sure we don't get caught owing Ryanair more money for our baggage.

My friend K wrote a brilliant blog a few months ago about how she packs light for her Ryanair excursions. Following her lead, I thought I'd share how we plan what we are going to bring and pack light with a toddler in tow. In all fairness, this beach vacation made it easier for us this time around to keep things light because the weather is forecasting hot temps with little to no rain, and we are staying at a two star bed & breakfast. That makes things slightly easier than packing sweaters and jackets and tennis shoes for colder temps with a lot of walking, or trying to pack stylish clothing for posh city visits and resorts.

We each get one carry-on and the dimensions are really strict. For four days and four nights, this is what we are taking with us:

So, what do we have insidee these three small bags, you ask? Well, for my little man, we still need to pack diapers. (Not sure when to expect that to change, so we'll accept it for now.) My friend, B, gave us a couple of her cloth "swimming diapers" so we could now avoid the need to buy separate diapers for pool-time. This worked out perfectly for this trip. I somehow managed to cram four full days worth of diapers and baby wipes, three pairs of shorts, five t-shirts, two swim trunks, and two cloth diapers for swimming into his small backpack. Phew! We are leaving late tonight to head to a hotel near Frankfurt Hahn airport, so he'll wear his summer jammies, and the outfit for the plane is sitting on top so we can avoid tearing the backpack apart to get to his clothes.

For my end, I packed mostly sarongs, tank tops, and sundresses. Since we don't really have room to bring towels with us and I'm not sure what our towel situation will be like at our small hotel, I figured the more sarongs the better so they can double as towels and cover on the beach. I am bringing one sarong that easily dresses up with a nicer tank top, one sundress that I'll wear on the plane and have available for other outings, and a wrap dress I bought on our honeymoon that I rarely ever get to wear that'll shape itself into about forty different types of dresses. Figured that could come in handy. I threw in a couple more casual sarongs and tank tops into the mix for beach time and wandering around town, and one extra tank for sleeping. Because we are hoping to spend a lot of time on the beach and in the pool, I'm bringing two bathing suits for each of us.

To bring things up a notch when our feet leave the sand for the pavement and we head out to dinners at night, I'm packing a few pieces of jewelry. I kept it simple though, but with a little variety of things that will dress up the sarongs. Things like small pendants, bangle bracelets, fun earings, and the necklace my sister made me. I plan on only bringing my wedding ring mostly because I'm paranoid about losing the others on the beach or having them get stolen. These will all fit carefully into a small cloth bag I can slide into my daypack.

Toiletries are kept to a minimum. In fact, most of what we are bringing is sunscreen. I'm sure we'll be able to buy more there, but I need plenty of it. The last thing we want is a sunburn on our vacation, and this family is as fair as they come, so we will be layering it on thick this weekend. I also packed small shampoos (including baby shampoo for little r) and conditioners and soap because I read that our two-star hotel doesn't provide any. Figured we could try not to smell too much... Tooth brushes, toothpaste, face wash, and face lotion are also necessities, but they don't take up much space. I'm keeping my make-up to a minimum as well, being sure it all fits in my small make-up bag. These items will fit easily into my small daypack leaving more room in the backpack for our clothes.

And finally, traveling with a toddler means we need to bring entertainment and fun snacks along for the plane, the car, the train, meals out at restaurants, and evenings before bed. In addition to a few cars, a coloring book and crayons, and fun snacks, we will also be toting our iPad for much needed movies when little r has had enough (as much as I hate the idea of plopping him down in front of a movie, it's a Godsend more often than not). In fact, our family is an electronic mess of toys and we will certainly be bringing a handful of them on this trip. The iPad, both of our iPhones, my kindle, and Big R's fancy camera will be in tow, as well as, all of the necessary charging devices. I debated for awhile whether we should also bring our Nook because it has all of little r's electronic books on it, but I think I'll pass on that this time around.

All of these things fit nicely into our three bags including Big R's clothes (two pairs of shorts, two polos, a long sleeve light-weight button down shirt, four t-shirts, and underware). I'm still debating whether I will be happy with only bringing one pair of sandals, and also whether I should bring a hoodie or small sweater to wear just in case things get chilly at night or on the plane. These will probably be last minute decisions...

Hopefully we'll end up with everything we need on this trip. We might actually have some space on the way home because we'll have fewer diapers, so some trinkets could come home with us.

I'll have to admit that it has gotten much easier to travel light as little r gets older. No bottles, baby food, or a million changes of clothes is necessary anymore. At this point though, I think practice starts to make perfect and you just figure out how to make it work. You rarely need as much as you think you do, especially when you are traveling to a developed country. One way or another, you can always track down the things you might have left behind. Challenge yourself on your next trip to pack a little less. You'll probably be thankful that you did :)